Flowers and Boundaries

Encouraging All Parents: When our Children Bring Flowers and Boundaries

I realized today that I’m impressed with their battle scars.  I feel the sting that they have battle scars even at all at their young age, but today I saw another perspective to my worries.  I saw the possible emerging miracle of it all.

Like so many, I’ve been working to evolve, where I can, all the while parenting with as much love as I can to these beings I love so much.

And I’ve been striving to create balanced, loving relationships that I can thrive in each day.  In my perfect world, I’m doing my job by modeling to my children, what their life could or could not look like when they’re in relationship in their own lives.  I just want them to see that this is a big part of life, living and thriving in relationships and in relationship with themselves.

And so, they see me celebrate and they see me struggle.  They see conflicted, and they see me comfort, and do my best to support myself and those around me.

And I’ve been so worried that I’m not always the role model I intended to be.  Even knowing as humans, we cannot be perfect, I’ve been concerned I was setting them up for hard times in life, with me not always being as perfect a parent as I’d like to be.  

But I’ve been witnessing them closely in the past few months, and I’ve made a fascinating discovery.  Some new things are coming to light, and my goodness, I’m starting to feel some serious relief!  

I’m starting to see them show skills born out of them witnessing real and authentic life.

I think the witnessing of me not always being perfect, but striving to show up with love as often as humanly possible, is giving them freedom.  And so, with a profound feeling of relief and a growing excitement, I see them taking the warrior path. The authentic and protector journey: doing what is right and needed to protect and support in situations and also to honour how they want to live their lives.

If there is discord around them, I see them heeding the call to protect needs to be protected.  I have seen them become vigilant, super focused and trying to sense the energy and potential discourse around them.   I see them showing up with strength.

Often, they intervene with introducing new energy or throwing out suggestions.  I see them trying to focus those involved in the situation back onto a balanced path.

Distraction, kindness, laughter - a hand of soothing.  I see them standing up for those around them and trying to steer things back into some semblance of balance.

I am in awe of their abilities.  They are early in their journey, but they show the empathic spectrum of traits combined with a strength, almost a fierceness to also take care of their life’s path.

I’m happy to see them mixing support with strength, and self-preservation with honesty.   I hope they can be both caring and still fervently pursue their dreams, and walk their own path in a gentle, relaxed way.  

I hope they take these newly emerging gifts and traits, and deepen even more into balance, goodness and strength for their family blood line.  I’m sure they’ll add in some laughter, some defiance, some deep curiosity.  They will bring order, flowers and boundaries to the world around them.

And so, I sit back for the first time, not in fear and worry.  And I don’t blame myself for not being strong enough to be balanced and perfect all the time.  As my Dad reminds me often “there is no perfect in life, Tracey”.  

And so, I aim to pass on this graceful way of treating yourself as a parent, not expecting perfection. I am seeing that possibly, the authenticity they have witnessed has somehow allowed their inner gifts to emerge.  I’m starting to visibly see how these strengths and their energy are already mending hearts.

I feel relief and joy truly, knowing that these seeds have taken root in them and are contributing - not inhibiting their own individual life and destiny.

It’s so beautiful.  I hope you can see your gifts growing around you, from parenting with love; you have grown and nurtured miracles all around you.  Just look, you will see.